October is for Wistful motherhoodmeanderings

the adoring look is less frequent over past couple of years..

That's about it..Kinda sad..kinda wistful-Why does October's waning light feel so melancholy? I must say I still look forward to no- more -corn- field..On a strictly personal level I am tired of losing chickens and 1/2 hour of sunset every night..I am still in adjustment mode with my girl's vacancy from the home.Quite wonderful in some moments of singular thinking and shedding of my mother hen-isms.Yet one distraught phone call of complaints,frustration brings it all back...the intensity of worry.yet with the added level of distance and inability to see her face. She demonstrates sadness through anger and accusation sometimes..and it makes it hard to lift the veil and see her struggles.She is an up and down kind of girl and the ride can be rocky..er tumultuous at times..and I often don't read her as well as I should after 18 years. Ah..motherhood!

Perhaps this week of cloud cover weighs heavy on our hearts and minds.